Thinking about it more, what hooked me is that stories are written in the voice of a young person, not yet stuck in an adult viewpoint, a locked in way of looking at things.
Beautifully written, well edited. Scott, you gave this to us as if it just occurred yesterday - immediate, alive, frightening. I can see why taking to the road was so compelling. I wonder if finding out what eventually happened to your mom in the end is essential for us to know? Maybe this provided enough for us to imagine the rest? Sharron at 🍁Leaves
Thanks for the detailed comments. This is the opening scene in my book and my hope is when people click on "Read Inside" on amazon, the will buy the book.
Just found you Scott and I would keep reading, I was hooked.
Thanks so much Sharon, I plan to publish the book next month.
Thinking about it more, what hooked me is that stories are written in the voice of a young person, not yet stuck in an adult viewpoint, a locked in way of looking at things.
Beautifully written, well edited. Scott, you gave this to us as if it just occurred yesterday - immediate, alive, frightening. I can see why taking to the road was so compelling. I wonder if finding out what eventually happened to your mom in the end is essential for us to know? Maybe this provided enough for us to imagine the rest? Sharron at 🍁Leaves
Thanks for the detailed comments. This is the opening scene in my book and my hope is when people click on "Read Inside" on amazon, the will buy the book.
Scott, this is really strong--very emotionally absorbing, and I’d want to read more.
Thanks for the feedback Tom.
Wow, what a great opening, Scott! That would definitely keep me reading. 👍
Thanks Brian. I appreciate the feedback
Pretty compelling opening, Scott. Hard to put that down....
Thanks Mark, This was critiqued by our writing group. It was a big help.